Cognitive
dissonance occurs when one’s thoughts contradict themselves, their thoughts
contradict their behaviors, or their behaviors contradict their other
behaviors. One of my largest problems with cognitive dissonance was remedied
this summer during an internship in California. I had a supervisor over me who
was from Columbia. Jeanelle Ariza is a brilliant female scientist who also has
a deep testimony of the power of Christ. Every morning she would ask me “how
are you today?” and I would tell her I was fine, to which she would squint her
eyes, put her little hands on her hips and say in her thick accent, “I don’t
believe you.” I believe Jeanelle to have a spiritual gift to read people. She
would tell me I was sad. She would ask me why and I had no answer for her. I
didn’t feel sad; I felt the way I always had felt. Because of her example and
curiosity and compassion, I began introspection and realized that while I acted
each day as though I was perfectly happy, inside I didn’t feel that way. The
curious thing was that I could not tell you what made me less than happy. One
day on the shuttle back from Sacramento, Jeanelle sat beside me and turned to
me. She simply said, “Tell me why you are sad.” And we talked about the sad
things of the world. I described for her some reasons that were perhaps beneath
the sadness she so easily read in me. We talked for the forty minute shuttle
ride and during that time Jeanelle bore her testimony to me of the power of
Christ to heal and change us. At this same time I was living with a family who
had suffered through their son struggling with severe depression. The parents
were extremely loving and such happy people. The mother was an especially kind
and loving woman who showed happiness in all her actions. She also spoke to me
during this time about the ability we have to be happy despite our
circumstances. I did a lot of thinking about the difference in the way I
presented myself to the world and the way I felt inside. In this environment,
and with the help of these two amazing women, I decided to align myself and did
so with the help of studying the enabling power of the Atonement of Jesus
Christ.
The
understanding of how we all experience cognitive dissonance can be very
beneficial. The old adage that knowledge is power still holds true. The more
you understand of a topic, the better prepared you are to deal with it in your
everyday life and the human psyche is no different. To truly live your life it
only makes sense to gain all the knowledge available about your own mind and the
why’s and how’s of it all. Being aware of cognitive dissonance allows us to
stop and say, “There. There I am
experiencing cognitive dissonance.” And then make a course correction.
While
struggling to grow this summer in the beauty of California, I made the enabling
power of the Atonement my focus in my personal study. As I learned from
Jeanelle about the dissonance in my behavior with my thoughts, I came to
understand more fully the problem behind living a life where you aren’t sure
why you live the way you do. Though I couldn’t say why, I was sad every day.
This is completely against the eternal plan, even the Plan of Happiness, as
described to the prophets of old. “Men are that they might have joy.” I wanted
to be happy, not just tell people I was, especially
if I didn’t have any good reason to not be! With the strength that comes when
we realize Whose we are, I was able to apply the Atonement more fully in my
life and change for the better. The
Atonement of Christ gives strength to us and reminds us that we are indeed
children of the Divine. The cognitive dissonance between this truth and the
actions that come from our earthly state can be reduced through Jesus Christ.
It takes recognition, humility, repentance, pulling on the power of Christ to
change our hearts, and then action. I was indeed given a change of nature
towards happiness and was given alignment that can only come from on High.
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