Thoughts from ME

 My older sister is a huge country fan. One of her favorite singers since she has been young is Tim McGraw. He sings a song entitled " One of These Days ." The song is about love and how everyone is searching for it, not only in other people but also in yourself. At the end, McGraw sings, "One of these days, I'm gonna love me and feel the joy of sweet release. One of these days, I'll rise above me and at last I'll find some peace...One of these days, I'm gonna love me."  God created us in his infinite wisdom to feel some kind of emptiness that is only filled when we find someone we truly connect with, who we love, who loves us, who we feel we can share eternity with. Part of that empty part of us is left empty until we also find love for ourselves.  We are told in Leviticus 19:18, in Matt 5:43-44, in Matt 23:37-40, Romans 13:9, and again in Galatians, James, Mosiah and even the Doctrine and Covenants "Love thy neighbor as thyself." It i...

"When you rest in quietness and your image of yourself fades, and your image of the world fades, and your ideas of others fade, what's left? A brightness, a radiant emptiness that is simply what you are." Adyashanti  Lately I have been thinking more about Jesus Christ and the attributes that make one more like him. One that has stood out to me lately is stillness. When you think of stillness what do you think of? I think of humility, the ability to listen, to stand quietly and observe. If you take time to observe children, often they want badly to be the center of attention. Not all of them are this way. Some kids grow out of it. Some don't. I like being the center of attention, having people listen to what I'm saying and react appropriately. I like making people laugh, knowing it was something I said or did that made them happy. But lately, I have been trying more and more to just sit back, to observe, to listen and be still. I like bright clothing, bright ti...

 If you think about it, today has been productive, at least if you compare it to most of my summer days so far. I woke up early, had breakfast of oatmeal with brown sugar and raisins, went to physical therapy, went to the Deseret Industries for some shirts, did a load of laundry, started a book, updated my brother's blog and helped with dinner. But despite all those things, I have felt restless all day long. Like I just want to be outside, running. I suppose maybe it's a build up of energy or something. But it's energy I can't seem to disperse. My knee is aching today. Physical therapy was hard and then Hannah and I spent two hours at the D.I. Even though I really want to go for a walk or even (I really wish) a run, I can't go. I'm very tired of my knee. Very, very tired.  So like I said, I updated my brother's blog. He's currently paying time in Central Utah Correctional Facility. He sends me some poems and I post them on his blog. Today's batch w...

To this day, one of my favorite smells is the mix of motor oil and orange scented cleaner. My dad is a mechanic and the cleaner was what he used (uses?) on his hands. Whenever we went camping, my dad always brought his guitar. That is one of the reasons I play too. One of the only memories I have of childhood is after I learned to ride a bike. One day I dragged my dad all over town on our bikes. We stopped for Creamies and squeaky cheese at this little dairy store that is no longer there. I always loved my orchestra concerts. I think more than the playing and being on stage, I loved knowing that if my dad had made it to the concert, I was going to be able to get ice cream with him at the nearby Artic Circle. My dad taught me how to camp, how to love old country music, how to make cookies...my dad makes a mean cookie! Thinking of his smile and laughter Always makes me miss him. And then I cry. He taught me it's okay to cry, even if you're a tough old mechanic. By e...

 Ever have those days (girls) when you think at some point, "Well this day was a total waste of make-up"? Yeah, for me, that was today. And mostly everyday actually now that I think about it. So today I went to church and it was quite possibly the most boring Sunday I remember having. Ever. My friend Kim, who is one of my TWO friends in Richmond who are not related to me, taught for the last time in Relief Society today because in a brief week and a half she will be departing Cache Valley for the great unknown, aka Provo UT. Kimberly Blau will soon don a black and white badge and enter the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah, before she leaves this great America for Japan. That's right, JAPAN. She spoke today in sacrament too, her dry run for her farewell talk next week. I swear I was checking the clock every five minutes, not because of Kim's talk, just the whole meeting was long. There was one part in church that I thoroughly enjoyed: Because Kim was talking, ...

- Hannah is at camp all week. - So is Aaron... - I'm sad for one of my best friends Rachel because dearest Elche has passed away - I'm listening to Aaron Carter and Jack Johnson - I made a smoothie for breakfast and it was not exactly "delish" - I miss breakfast cereal...actually I miss shopping for my own food, preparing my own food, and eating my own food - food that I choose. - I should appreciate not making my own food while it lasts... - NEXT WEEKEND IS MY FAMILY REUNION AND BOTH JAY AND CRYSTAL WILL BE THERE!!! With their spouses! YAY!!! - I am walking without crutches and Almost with no limp - But Larry was less than excited that I came to pt without my crutches when he hadn't told me I could... whoops - I have a crush on a guy with a girlfriend - Sooo lame! :P - I read the cutest book yesterday: "Last Knight" by Hilari Bell - Really good book, I just gobbled it right up! - So I realized this morning I've been going to school in Re...

Whether people really believe that it falls on listening ears, many pray anyway. I think it is in our very nature to pray. The Church teaches that we pray to a real being. God listens to our prayers and answers them as He sees fit in his awesome wisdom and love. How easy it is to pray! To thank Him for what we have and ask Him for what we do not. How much harder it is to pay attention to when those prayers are answered. In C.S. Lewis’ book The Screwtape Letters , Screwtape is an underling of whom they call Father Below, or Satan. The book consists of letters Screwtape is writing to his nephew Wormwood. His nephew is trying to corrupt a young man who has recently become a Christian and a follower of God, or as Screwtape calls him, the Enemy. In one of his early letters, Screwtape writes about prayer. He says, “But of course the Enemy will not meantime be idle. Whenever there is prayer, there is danger of His own immediate action. He is cynically indifferent to the dignity o...